Special requests: the ones to promise and refuse

"Could we have a table by the window?" "It's my mother's eightieth, could you do something?" "We'll have a pram with us." "My son has a nut allergy." Every booking diary fills with special requests, and each one is a small promise waiting to be kept or broken. Kept, a request makes a guest feel looked after before they have even arrived. Broken, it becomes the thing they remember about the evening, however good the food was.

The trouble is that most venues answer every request the same way: "Of course, no problem." Some of those requests are easy to keep. Some depend on things nobody can control on the night. A few should not be agreed to at all. When everything is promised, something will eventually let a guest down.

This guide sorts special requests into three groups: the ones to promise, the ones to try for without promising, and the ones to refuse kindly. It covers how to word each answer, why allergies and access needs are not requests at all but part of serving a guest safely, and how to record each request once, in the right place, so the whole team sees it on the night. Every figure in it is an example.

A special request is anything a guest asks for beyond a table at a time for a number of people. Some are about where they sit: a window, a booth, a quiet corner, away from the door, near the toilets for a guest who needs them. Some are about the occasion: a birthday, an anniversary, a proposal, a celebration cake. Some are about the people: a pram, a high chair, a wheelchair, a guide dog, a guest who is hard of hearing. Some are about the food: an allergy, a diet, a dish they loved last time.

Each of these is a different kind of promise, and the answer depends on what the venue can actually guarantee on the night. That is where sorting them helps.

Every special request deserves one of three answers, and the guest should know which one they have been given.

The mistake most venues make is turning the second kind into the first: promising a window table on a Saturday night, when the window tables are already booked and the host cannot move people. A guest who was told "we'll do our best" and gets a lovely table elsewhere is happy. A guest who was promised the window and is seated by the kitchen door is not.

Some requests are entirely in the venue's control, and can be promised with confidence, provided they are recorded and prepared for.

These are promises because the venue decides the outcome. What turns them into broken promises is not the request itself but the note that never reached the person who needed to act on it: the high chair nobody fetched, the cake that came out at the wrong table. Promise them, record them clearly, and check them before service.

Other requests depend on things the venue cannot fully control on the night: which tables are free, how long earlier guests stay, how busy the room is. These should be noted and tried for, never promised.

Answer these warmly, and honestly: "I've noted that you'd love a window table. We can't guarantee one on a Saturday, but we'll do our best." Then actually do your best. The host should see the request when planning the tables, and give it a fair chance.

A few requests should be declined, because agreeing to them would mean a promise the venue cannot keep, or one that would be unfair to other guests.

Refusing does not have to sound like a refusal. Explain the reason and offer what you can: "We can't promise the kitchen is completely nut-free, because we use nuts in some dishes. What we can do is prepare your son's meal separately and go through the menu with you when you arrive." A clear, kind no, with an alternative, is far better than a vague yes that fails.

Allergies are often written down among the requests, but they are something different. A window table is a preference; an allergy is a matter of safety. It is not something to try for or to refuse lightly. It is part of serving the guest at all.

Treat allergies on their own terms. Record them separately from other requests, so they cannot be lost among notes about tables and cakes. Make sure they reach the kitchen with the order, not just the booking. And always ask again at the table, whatever the booking says, because allergies change, other guests in the party may have their own, and a note made days earlier is a prompt, not a guarantee.

In the UK, the Food Standards Agency's allergen guidance for food businesses sets out what businesses must do, including giving accurate information about the 14 major allergens. Our guide to the allergen conversation at the table covers how to have that conversation well.

An allergen matrix is a chart that shows which of the major allergens each dish contains. It is the document the team should use to answer allergy questions, at booking and at the table, instead of memory or guesswork.

Keep the allergen matrix up to date whenever a dish, a recipe or a supplier changes. Keep a copy where the person taking bookings can see it, so a guest who asks on the phone whether there is anything they can eat gets an accurate answer, or an honest "let me check with the kitchen and call you back". A booking taken with a confident reassurance that turns out to be wrong is far worse than one taken with a promise to check.

Requests about access are also more than preferences. A guest who uses a wheelchair, walks with a stick, has a guide dog or cannot manage stairs needs a table they can reach and use. In the UK, the Equality Act requires businesses to make reasonable adjustments so that disabled people are not put at a disadvantage; the government's Equality Act guidance explains what that means.

Accessible seating starts with knowing your room. Know which tables are step-free, which have space beside them for a wheelchair, which are near accessible toilets, and which are hard to reach on a busy night. When a guest mentions an access need, ask what would help, rather than guessing: "Is there anything that would make the table easier for you?" Then plan the table in advance, and make sure the route to it will be clear when the guest arrives. Our guide to designing a restaurant floor plan that sells covers routes through the room.

Families bring their own set of requests: high chairs, space for a pram, a table away from the kitchen door, children's portions, a quick first course. Most of these can be promised if they are known in advance.

Count your high chairs and booster seats, and do not promise more than you have. Know which tables can take a pram beside them without blocking a route. If you offer a children's menu, say so when the family books, and if you do not, say what the kitchen can do. A family who arrives to find the high chair ready and the table set for them is a family that comes back.

Occasions are the requests guests care about most, because they are about someone else: a partner, a parent, a friend. They are also the easiest to get wrong, because the moment, a cake at the right time, a greeting at the door, matters as much as the gesture.

Ask what the guest has in mind, and agree what you will do. A candle in a dessert, a short message on a plate, a glass of something at the start: whatever it is, agree it at booking, write it down precisely, including the time if it matters, and tell the team at the briefing. If the guest is bringing a cake, agree when it arrives, where it is kept, and whether there is a charge for serving it. Our guide to booking notes the whole team will actually read covers how to write these so they reach the right people.

Some venues welcome dogs; many do not, or only in certain areas. Make the rule clear on your website and in your confirmation, so guests do not have to ask. Assistance dogs are a separate case: in the UK they should be welcomed in line with the Equality Act, whatever the general rule on pets.

If dogs are welcome in some areas only, treat a request to bring one as a seating request: note it, and place the party in an area where dogs are allowed.

Some requests are about when rather than where: finishing by a set time for the theatre, a late arrival because of a train, a long lunch for a business meeting. Time requests can usually be promised, because the venue controls the pace of service, but they need to reach the kitchen and the server, not just the host.

Write the time constraint on the booking clearly, and make sure the server knows it at the start of the meal. A party that has to leave by 7.15 should not have to remind the server three times; the kitchen should know to send their courses promptly. Our guide to turn times covers planning for services with a fixed end time.

Regulars often have standing requests: the same table, a particular wine, a dish made a certain way. These belong on the guest profile, not on each booking, so they appear every time the guest books without anyone having to remember them.

Standing requests are still subject to the same three answers. A regular's favourite table can be tried for, but not guaranteed, on a busy night. Tell them so, kindly, and they will understand far better than if the table is quietly given to someone else.

The most common reason a special request fails is not that the venue refused it, but that the note never reached the person who needed to act on it. Record each request once, in the right place:

Guest profiles carry lasting facts into every future booking, so the team does not rely on whoever takes the next booking to ask again. Our guide to guest profiles your floor team will trust covers what to keep there. Whatever goes on the booking or the profile should then appear where it is needed: at the door, on the table and, for allergies, on the kitchen ticket.

The words used at booking set the guest's expectations, so choose them carefully for each kind of request.

Notice that each answer is specific. "We'll see what we can do" leaves the guest unsure whether they have a promise or not, and they will usually assume they do.

Many special requests arrive by phone, often from guests who call precisely because they have something to ask. The host on the phone has the best chance to sort the request, give the right answer and record it properly. Our guide to taking bookings by phone when the room is full covers the call itself.

Ask the question directly on every call: "Is there anything we should know, any allergies or anything you'd like for the evening?" Many guests do not think to mention a request until they are asked.

Some requests arrive only when the guest does: a table away from the draught, a quieter spot, a high chair nobody mentioned. Hosts can often help, but they should not move other booked guests or promise tables that are due to someone else. Offer what is available now, and if nothing suits, offer a wait for the next suitable table.

Our guide to running the door on a full Friday night covers how the host balances these requests with everything else happening at the door.

Despite everything, a promise is sometimes broken: the cake comes out at the wrong time, the high chair is missing, the window table went to someone else. When it happens, say so at once, apologise without excuses, and put it right as far as you can: the cake brought back properly, a dessert on the house, a word from the manager.

Then find out why. A missed request is almost always a note that did not travel, and each one shows where the routine needs fixing.

Everyone who takes bookings should give the same answers to the same requests. Write a short request policy listing the common requests in your venue, with the answer for each: promised, tried for or declined, and what to offer instead. Keep it at the host stand and in the training for new staff.

A short list might include: high chairs, prams, accessible seating, dogs, cakes from outside, specific tables, quiet tables, time constraints, children's menus, celebration extras and any charges for them. Review it whenever the room, the menu or the rules change.

Some requests carry a cost: serving a cake brought from outside, opening a guest's own wine, a special arrangement for a large occasion. If you charge, say so at booking, clearly and in money, so it is part of the agreement rather than a surprise on the bill. A charge the guest agreed to is accepted; one they discover when they pay causes complaints.

An invented brasserie takes special requests on the phone and online and says yes to all of them. On busy nights, it regularly lets guests down: window tables promised and not available, cakes forgotten in the fridge, a high chair missing because all four were in use.

It writes a request policy. Window tables and quiet corners are now noted and tried for, with the answer worded accordingly. High chairs are counted at booking, and families are told if all are taken. Cakes are recorded with a time and checked at the briefing. Allergies go in their own place on the booking and the guest profile and are asked about again at the table. Within a few weeks, complaints about broken promises nearly disappear, and the team finds the requests easier to manage because everyone knows the answers.

In servearound, staff record special requests, notes and allergies on the booking or the guest's profile, and they appear on the reserved table on the floor plan and, for allergies, on the kitchen ticket with the order. Lasting details such as allergies, dietary needs and preferences live on guest profiles, so they show on every future booking. See the reservations module and guest profiles.

Guests do not add requests on servearound's booking page today, so they are taken by your team: on the phone, at the table, or by email, since replies to booking emails go to your venue's email address. If you switch on table choice, guests can pick their own table when they book, on the 2D plan or in the room in 3D, so a guest who wants the window can see it. Dishes carry their allergen and dietary information on the guest menu, and the confirmation email can be edited to invite guests to tell you about anything you should know.

Anything beyond a table at a time for a number of people: a table preference, an occasion, a high chair, a pram, access needs, a diet or a time constraint.

No. Promise only what you control, try for what depends on the night, and decline kindly what you cannot do, offering an alternative.

On a quiet night, perhaps. On a busy one, note it and say you will do your best, rather than promising.

No. Allergies are a matter of safety. Record them in their own place, make sure they reach the kitchen, and always ask again at the table.

A chart of which major allergens each dish contains, used to answer allergy questions accurately instead of from memory.

Know which tables are step-free and have space, ask the guest what would help, plan the table in advance and keep the route to it clear.

Requests about this visit on the booking; lasting facts such as allergies and favourite tables on the guest profile.

Explain the reason briefly and offer what you can do instead. A clear, kind no is better than a vague yes that fails.

That is your choice, but if you do, say so at booking, in money, so it is not a surprise on the bill.

Apologise at once, put it right as far as you can, and find out which note failed to reach the right person.

Special requests fall into three groups. Promise the ones you control, such as high chairs, cakes at a set time and dietary needs the kitchen can meet. Try for the ones that depend on the night, such as window tables and quiet corners, and say so. Decline kindly the ones you cannot keep, with an alternative.

Treat allergies and access needs as part of serving the guest safely, not as preferences: use the allergen matrix, know your accessible seating, and ask again at the table. Record each request once, on the booking or the guest profile, make sure it reaches the door, the table and the kitchen, and give the whole team the same written answers, so every promise made at booking is kept on the night.